Friday, December 3, 2010

Mama Drama

My mother is a wonderful mother and always has been.  She comforted me, disciplined me, loved me, and taught me to love others.  If there was one thing I would change, it's that she doesn't love herself enough.  She is a worrier and a bit of a pessimist, which eventually adds up to being overly protective of her children and grandchildren.

Case in point...my sister had "procedure" a few weeks ago.  Because of all of the privacy laws in the U.S. and because my sister did not list her as a person with whom the doctor could share information, when our mom arrived at the office, they would not tell her if my sister was checked in or not.  Long story short, she eventually found her and my dad (they're divorced, i.e. more drama).  But, not before worrying herself into a panic and then being rude to the girl at the reception desk and yelling at my post-procedure, drugged up baby sister.  My dad apparently then pointed out the inappropriateness of her behavior and indicated to her that she was smothering her girls.

How do I know this, and what does this have to do with me?  Well, because my sister was loopy and sleeping most of the evening, I am the one who had the tearfully asked "do I smother you guys?" thrown on me when I called to check on my sister.  In typical passive-aggressive fashion, however, she dropped it as soon as she asked it.  So, for now, it sits quietly on the shelf of unresolved issues in all of our houses.

I know all kids have dramas with their mamas.  Looking ahead, I see my own daughter and what she might say about me...not good...not good at all...

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Two-for-one

Today we have a two-for-one.  They are totally unrelated to each other, but both are worth posting.  Well, to me they are worth posting.  Your opinion is just that, yours.  Read and decide...

Number one:
This past Sunday I came home from a church service potluck (LifeWater Community Church) with a horrible headache.  (This was not caused by the sermon, food, or anything like that!)  The only thing I could do to escape the discomfort was take a nap, so I snuggled up in the recliner with my 10-year-old and proceeded to fall asleep.  I really don't know how long I had been asleep, but do you know how it is to hear something while you're asleep that you sub-consciously know is a part of the conscious world?  You aren't asleep enough to not hear it, so it pulls you from a semi-conscious state into full consciousness?  Well, while I was sleeping, I heard this horrible snoring sound.  Only after hearing it a second time and being pulled into full consciousness did I realize that the loud, chainsaw snoring was coming from my own mouth!  Both the hubs and the daughter laughed at me as I laughed at myself.  Then, I readjusted my position so my mouth wouldn't be hanging open and went back to sleep.

Number two:
I work in small, but busy, office.  We have four PCs that are connected to a server along with three printers and all the typical office software, including an accounting program, an anti-virus package, etc.  We can log into our server from our home computers.  Earlier this year we survived replacing/upgrading our server and replacing/upgrading the owner's office PC.  We are now in the first stages of replacing my work PC and changing the office over to the newest Microsoft and Windows products.  So, when my boss called yesterday and casually asked me if we had ordered the new equipment and software yet, you can imagine my completely stupefied expression when he said, "My brother says Apples are better than PCs.  Maybe we should look at changing."  I think my response, both words and emotion, expressed my opinion of this comment only too clearly.

Now, before this turns into a PC vs. Mac war, I am not opposed to Macs, but they are not designed for doing what we do.  We do not design artwork, buildings, or magazines.  We run an office that pushes paper, and though the process of what we do is not hard, it is complicated, and we have over 10 years of data in our system that would be lost should we make this change.  Virtually every computer, printer, and software program would have to be replaced, including the equipment purchased earlier this year.  In all likelihood the office would have to shut down for a week at minimum, something the boss definitely does not want to do and did not factor into his comment.

The kicker of this was that he still wanted me to call our IT guy and ask his opinion of changing the office to Macs simply because his brother says the Mac OS is better!  So, I did call our IT guy who, of course, said it was possible and that he would be happy to do it.  "Show me the money," was also part of what he said.  The labor time on this alone would probably cost $10,000.00.  So, I made the recommendations to the boss and, so far, haven't heard another word about it.  Let's just hope it stays that way.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Getting off the Wheel

I haven't posted for a month, and I can feel it.  When I stress out, I want to write, but usually being too busy is the cause of the stress, which means I don't make enough time to write.  It's a vicious circle, and one that I will be running more often than not.  It's like being a hamster on a wheel...running and running and never really getting anywhere but worn out.  But, enough whining.

It's another beautiful, if cold, October morning in northeastern Indiana.  The sun is shining and the sky is a brilliant, clear blue.  There are still leaves on the trees, but there are also leaves on the ground.  Each tree is wearing a different shade of green, orange, and red.  As the wind blows the leaves on the driveways and streets, they sound like rain falling.  But, until the rain actually comes in November, the fall here will be beautiful.

We're headed to my mom and step-dad's lake house tonight and will stay over night there.  The hubs and step-dad will fish into the dark and cold late evening.  A campfire might possibly be burning later as well, and my kids will enjoy looking up at the stars while they eat s'mores.  As long as they don't irritate each other, or me, it will be a perfect evening with family.  I'm looking forward to this mini retreat and to getting away from the mess of my own house, though it's only for a short time.

For the first time in two weeks, this hamster is getting of her wheel, even if just for a day.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Out of the blues

I haven't written a word in two weeks, but today I needed to write.  I was in a bit of a funk.  Actually, it was more than a "bit" of a funk.  Part of last week and the first of this week, I was in such a state that I was ready to quit my job, not just quit but walk out.  To do what?  Well, write, if the right opportunity came along.  But, do nothing was looking good.  Besides, as writers know, helping to feed your family when you are just starting out isn't too likely anyway.  My mood was pretty dark, and I wasn't feeling very happy in a general way.  As it would turn out, I had a church board meeting on Tuesday. (I'm on the board of LWCC, check us out if you get the chance!)  We were talking about where all of the board members are spiritually, and what one dear friend of mine said helped to adjust my mindset.  Without divulging too much, let's just say that this person has so much on her plate that anyone who was under this much pressure would break, if it were not for God's help.  She basically stated that she surrendered her problems to God and asked His wisdom about how to handle it all, and in the end, she found the kind of peace only He can give.  Her words were a reminder to me that I am not the one in control here and that I needed to give all of my own stresses over to God to handle--the kids (grades, weight issues, teen-stuff, etc.), the husband (who's job keeps him away from home most evenings), the job (UGH!), and even the stresses of my church.  So, I did, and what do you know?  Suddenly I'm feeling a bit better.  Maybe I'm finally headed out of the blues.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Maybe I'm Still Tired, But...

It may be that I am STILL tired, but there have been a few recent situations that have done nothing but irritate me.  First, without providing specific details, is my work.  I work for a small company in a small office.  Most of the time this has some good perks to it.  Other times, well, not so much.  We've been busy (a positive in this economy), but when your boss wastes time, and I'm talking hours a day here, reviewing the same topics over and over with no conclusions, it gets a bit frustrating.  We bust our buns to get our work done, which is challenge enough.  Then we spend time we don't have in meetings that aren't necessary.  Anyone else feel the pain?  I know this type of thing happens just about everywhere one can work.  However, though not new, still very annoying.  It has been exacerbated lately by a specific problem for which the two principal parties offer NO solution and just continue to joust at one another.  All the while the office is in a holding pattern waiting for the match to be over so we can accomplish the work about which they are arguing.

On the personal side, I found out today that a family member passed away.  He was a great-uncle (read: we weren't close) and 101 years old.  So while I am sad, I am more sad for my grandmother and the rest of the family in their loss of a brother, father, etc.  That being said, and I don't want to forget that his death is the big picture, I found this out via a trail I won't follow here.  Let's just say that the person who knew should NEVER have known before actual family (i.e., my sister and I) were notified.  I'm not sure why we still haven't been told, but I don't appreciate it, and am actually rather angry and upset at the people who chose this method of "getting the word out."  We'll have our conversation soon.

So maybe I'm just still tired, but I'm not the only one upset by both situations.  For once, it's not just me.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Let the tired begin

My kids started school last week which means my summer sleeping schedule has come to an ending.  The usual summer routine of sleeping until 7 or 7:30 is over, and the alarm is now going off at 5:30am.  After a week, I am still not adjusted to the change.  I am, by nature, a night person.  It's much easier for me to stay up until 2am than to get up at 5am, and I can't seem to go to sleep before 10:30-11:00pm.  While 6 1/2 hours of sleep might be enough for some, it's just not enough for me on any kind of long-term basis.  Though my work day is shorter than 8 hours, I play "single mom" quite frequently in the evenings due to my spouse's work schedule.  I am not complaining, and I know there are a lot of people out there with longer, more stressful days than mine.  But, even an hour more of sleep a day would be welcome.  As long as I can train myself to go to sleep earlier soon, I should be able to adjust.  If not, it looks like a lot of Sunday afternoon naps are on the agenda.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Here we go...

It's my first entry on my first blog, my own little spot out there in the vastness of the web.  Perhaps no one will ever see what I write here, and perhaps a lot of people will see it.  Either way, I'm excited to finally join the internet conversation.  I often have more to say than I know what to do with, and now I have a spot for putting it all "out there."  I don't Tweet (at least not yet), but I do use Facebook.  However, THIS is the place for real expression.  What will I have to say?  I don't know.  Will there be any specific topic or agenda?  No.  I have no idea where this is going or what we're going to find on the way there.  So, on that note, hang on to your shorts, because here...we...go!